family Archive

Day 9 – Don’t be a backseat driver

Published: January 2, 2012

A Perfect Driving Companion

I think there is kindness in not being a backseat driver. I try to bite my tongue when my hubby is behind the wheel but there are times when this does not work and an argument ensues. This week, however, I am making a diligent effort to be a kind  – and quiet – passenger.

In turn, I’d like to thank to all the kind souls who held their tongues while I was behind the wheel – thank you.

Although I can no longer thank my grandfather in person, I will send a shout out to him for his kindness – and patience – in teaching me to drive. He was my designated adult. Mom was too nervous with me behind the wheel and my dad had given up on me learning the rules of the road. So there was Grandpa, recuperating from a surgery, and patiently riding shotgun with me.

Looking back on it now, I can’t think of a more dreadful way to recuperate. Stuck in the passenger seat of a yellow Volkswagon Rabbit with a surly teenager and her newly minted learner’s permit.

He never complained about my driving skills though. Not even when I pressed hard on the gas pedal to back out of a parking space only to realize I was not in reverse. Not even when car tires weaved on and off the dirt road. And he stayed silent while I continued to adjust cassette tapes while circling around the same streets, trying to determine how many times I could drive past my boyfriend’s house without his family noticing. Grandpa never said a word.

Perhaps after all he had been through with his surgery he thought, if it’s going to end now, it might as well end right here in a little yellow diesel rabbit driven by my granddaughter.

Through all of this, somehow, I managed to get to my driver’s license. Even more remarkable my grandfather continued to ride with me. Perhaps he was indeed my perfect driving companion.

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Day 7 – Read a recipe for family stew

Published: December 31, 2011

Family is warm, messy and unpredictable at times, just like stew. Try to make it just to your taste only to find out it changes the longer things simmer and never quite turns out the way you expect.

Yet it is family nonetheless – genes united, faith intertwined. Acceptance and kindness for who we do become may be the secret ingredient to a much better family stew.

A Recipe for Family Stew

  • Take 1 large pot. Mix together assorted sizes, shapes, and temperaments of Mom and Dad.
  • Add children gradually with care and love.
  • Sprinkle on dreams, encouragement, patience, honesty, and pride.
  • Stir in work, friends, pets, schools, life’s ups and downs, picnics, parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters, nuts and bolts.
  • Don’t forget some craziness, kisses, hugs, fanny pats, and more patience, tooth faries, Santa Claus, angels, witches, gremlins, and goblins.
  • Take a large scoop of luck, an abundance of energy; keep blending constantly with all the other ingredients.
  • Bring to a boil – then simmer for 20 or more years over a very moderate flame.

If the stew becomes too thick after 15 years or so, turn off the heat (teen years); stew can turn unpredictable at this time.

All stews are original and need generous amounts of imagination, fortitude, and tolerance to keep from turning rancid.

The magic of this incredible stew is that after 50 years the aroma still lingers and the pot never empties, although the flavor may vary, depending on tastes, preference, and seasonings.

Bon Appetit!

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Family Delight at Soldiers Delight

Published: September 6, 2010

Our trip to Soldiers Delight started off like most of our day trips with the kids: A lot of complaints and groans. We did our best to entice the kids into the car and once we were on the road things went smoother…at least for a little while: “Are we there yet?”

Soldiers Delight is well worth the trip

Soldiers Delight was well worth the rough start to our day. It is a 3,000 acre Natural Environment Area owned by the state of Maryland and administered by the Department of Natural Resources. We did the 2.5-mile hike (See Soldiers Delight trail map) and got to explore the unusual terrain extending from rocky meadows to woods. We learned that the area includes 1,900 acres of serpentine barren with over 39 rare or endangered plant species including rare insects, rocks and minerals. Apparently, serpentine barrens are unique ecosystems in the U.S. consisting of grassland / savannas where you would normally expect forests. Serpentine barrens also have unusually high concentrations of iron, chromium, nickel and cobalt.

As we walked along the path we noticed areas of burnt trees among the grasslands.We found out this was due to an effort underway to remove 1,000 acres of Virgina Pines which are threatening the grassland plant species.

This prescribed burning is conducted twice a year to return the area back to its natural serpentine habitat. If you are interested in volunteering for this effort, be sure to check out the Maryland Department of Natural Resources website.

What makes Soldiers Delight unusual?

The geology of this area is what sets it apart from other areas. It is here at Soldiers Delight where chromium was first discovered in the United States. You’ll find a wide presence of other elements as well including magnesium, nickel, iron, as well as an uncommon rock called “serpentine” (greenish metamorphic rock that was used primarily in the interior trim of banks, hotels and even the Empire State Building).

One can’t help but notice walking through Soldiers Delight that there are few species able to tolerate these geologic conditions. The meager soil conditions creates stunted woods along meadows of yellow grasses. The serpentine rock areas offer little shade and the temperatures can get very hot during the summer months.

The history of Soldiers Delight and Isaac Tyson Jr.

It is believed that when young Isaac Tyson Jr., a chemistry and geology student, was shown black rocks by his family’s gardener, he identified these rocks as chromite. Further testing confirmed he was right and Isaac soon began mining chromite to become the founder of Baltimore Chrome Works.

Isaac ended up controlling the chromium market in the mid-nineteenth century — making him a very wealthy man. Between 1828 and 1850 all the chromium used in the world came from Isaac’s mines.

The Choate Mine

Isaac’s main operation at Soldiers Delight was the Choate Mine. The mine entrance is still visible when you visit Soldiers Delight. Although it was tempting to get a closer look, fencing prohibited us in getting too close to the mine.

Where did the name Soldiers Delight come from?

Why the area is called “Soldiers Delight” remains a mystery. Some speculate “soldiers” is a reference to the rangers from nearby Fort Garrison who hunted and patrolled the area in the service of the King of England. Others believe that during the French and Indian War, local militia were stationed at Soldiers Delight and were supplied with generous amounts of food by the locals (much to the Soldier’s delight).

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Cherry Blossoms, a Cherry Tree and Cherry Pie

Published: March 3, 2010

Cherry Blossoms

You know spring is around the corner in DC when people start talking about the Cherry Blossom Festival. Although it’s still a month away, I think we’re all sick of snowpocalypse (have I mentioned they are predicting an inch of snow today?) and we’re looking forward to seeing our green lawns again.

A Cherry Tree


Growing up in Vermont, I remember my grandmother’s cherry tree in full bloom. Of course, being that it was Vermont, I don’t remember seeing the cherry blossoms until May. However, once those cherries were ripe, my grandmother would put them to good use in jams and pies. My grandmother, like my mom, made an amazing cherry pie–bittersweet, plump, juicy cherry filling with a homemade lattice top.
Never mind how much sugar is put into a cherry pie, cherries actually have a lot of wonderful health benefits. Did you know studies have shown cherries may provide relief for muscle and joint soreness? Cherries also are a natural source of melatonin–a powerful antioxidant produced by the body’s pineal gland that regulates sleep patterns. Eating melatonin-rich cherries can be a natural way to help you get a good night’s sleep.

A Cherry Pie

Since I have pie on the mind, and International Pi day (that’s the number Pi) is coming up, I thought I would share a cherry pie recipe. Enjoy!

Homemade Cherry Pie

  • 1 qt. (pitted) sweet cherries
  • 1/2 c. granulated sugar
  • 1 tsp. lemon juice
  • 3 tsp. corn starch
  • Dash salt
  • 9 inch baked pie crust

Place cherries into a medium-size bowl and then extract the juice. Reserve cherries. Drain the cherry juice into a medium-size saucepan. Add sugar, cornstarch and salt to cherry juice and blend. Stir mixture over medium heat until thickened. Remove from heat and stir in lemon juice. Cool to lukewarm. Then fold the reserved cherries into the cooled glaze. Chill to re-thicken and then transfer to your baked pie shell.

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My Dad

Published: February 22, 2010

My dad is in the hospital today. I live far from my family so the only thing I can do today is to anxiously wait. Waiting is horrible. For anyone who has had someone you love become ill, you probably know what I mean.

For some, attempting a Lindsey Vonn visualization exercise helps the time go by. That’s when you start visualizing a doctor telling your loved one that he will be fine, and to take 2 aspirins and go home.

For others, you may begin to remember moments in time with your loved one. As the movie reel plays in your mind, your anxiety may soon turn bittersweet.

  • You begin to feel bad about being such a bratty kid when you were young and then you realize you have two bratty kids (at times) of your own and perhaps that’s just the way kids are.
  • And you see how hard it is to raise a family while working and you remind yourself to thank your dad for just being him.
  • And you see how scary the world can be and you finally understand why your dad would go out looking for you if you were not home before dark and you add this to your list of thank you’s.
  • And then you start to feel bad about dating someone 4 years older than you when you were 16 and you silently thank God that you have boys .
  • And then you begin to wonder how on earth your father was able to handle you moving 3,000 miles away when you were 22 and realize that your kids will probably do the same.
  • And then you wonder how your father reacted when he learned that you had moved into your San Francisco apartment with 3 strange boys and you think perhaps your mom never told him.
  • And you get a little sad remembering when you had to leave Seattle after your parents relocated there and you wonder if your dad has ever really forgiven you.
  • And, as you wait by the phone, you question why you have to live so far away and then realize that it is just how things were meant to be.

And then, after speaking with him on the phone, you hang up and wonder if you will handle aging and being sick as gracefully as he does.

And for that, you realize, you will just have to wait and see.

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My Camera and I Have a Love Hate Relationship

Published: February 16, 2010

My camera and I have a love / hate relationship. I show my camera nothing but love and adoration while my camera continues to hate me. It’s pretty straight forward. Our roles are clear. However, I’m not sure how it all started.

I suspect it may have something to do with the day I plunked down more money than I care to confide here on this camera. That was the day that I was fondling my new camera proudly while walking out of the store and then proceeded to drop it on the sidewalk. No doubt an omen of what was to come and, sure enough, my camera has tortured me ever since.

Our relationship has not improved with age

Our relationship, this camera and I, has not improved with age. I will take it gleefully to important life events — Christmas concerts, my kid’s sporting events, family birthday parties — and it will decide to act up and misbehave.

My camera starts out acting nice, leading me on by giving me one really good shot. This is when I remember why I spent more money than I care to confide here on this camera. Then, just as quickly as it gave me that one good shot, my camera will suddenly turn on me.

Torture devices are varied

My camera’s torture devices are varied, such as when it decides without any warning that its battery is dead. And this usually occurs right as we are about to sing Happy Birthday, or when my son is going to score a goal. Other times my camera changes things up a bit, claiming its “memory card is full” even though I cleared it out before leaving the house.
Yet these hardships are nothing compared to the pictures it takes of me. This is when the camera really decides to get vicious. Now, if you’ve known me for a few years, you will see the evidence of my camera’s intolerable treatment: Closed eyes, red eyes, eyes squinting, mouth open, no smile, too much smile, gums showing, hair in eyes, hair sticking up — you name it, my camera has captured it all (and laughed at me the whole time).

At some point I will have had enough. That is the day that I will go and spend more money than I care to confide here on a new camera. I’m looking forward to that day. After all, show me a photogenic person and I will show you a nice and very well-behaved camera.

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Ode to a Bay Window

Published: February 6, 2010

One thing you notice as you get older is that your house starts to look the way your body feels. The paint begins to crack, window frames look worn, tables get coffee-stained, and couch fabrics are torn. Even your curtains start to look wrinkly and faded from the sun. You know in your heart that it’s time for a makeover — for your house (although you could probably use one as well) — and you start to dream about how you could get on a show like ABC’s Extreme Makeover Home Edition.

Knowing that reality shows are not in my near future (there is no “balloon boy” living in this house), I decided to restart my honey-do list. The vacuum cleaner was first on my list of repairs. I honestly believe this is the most important item we have in our house.

Going without a vacuum for even a day means wading through 3 inches of hair to get down the hall to our living room, only then to sit down on a chair to become covered by another inch of fur.

Leaving the house looking like an exact replica of your Golden Retriever is not very attractive. It would be very reasonable for people to stand as far away from me as possible, especially those who are allergic to pets. So you can see why the Sears call had to be first on my list. And $88 later I am still waiting for my vacuum to come home.

In the meantime, in between dusting the pet hair off my clothes, I have been obsessing about our front windows. Three windows actually: 2 bedroom windows and 1 bay. There are so many reasons to replace these windows that I will not even get into the details but let me assure you of one thing: Windows are not cheap.

And, just when you think you have found the cheapest windows out there, you are told that no matter what you do for your house NEVER EVER go with the cheapest windows. So now we are looking at over $6,000 just for a bay window. This eye-popping, “hurt my wallet” sum has made me write a poem that I will now entitle:

Ode to the Bay Window

$6,000 for a bay window
Now I know why I am feeling so blue,
This was the price of my new car at age 22.

$6,000 for a bay window
Single-paned, cracked, chipped and worn,
The decision to shell out more on this house is enough to cause me to mourn.

$6,000 for a bay window
They say I’ll save money in tax credits and heating
So if they’re right, why do I feel like they’re cheating?

$6,000 for a bay window
I’m willing my heating problems to some other louse,
Maybe it’s cheaper to just sell this darn house.

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